“Someday” and “Maybe” Numbers: The Challenge of Dividing Retirement Assets Part 3
{4:00 minutes to read} In Part 2, we discussed marital vs non-marital retirement assets and how some of those assets require an actuary or other expert to figure out the “present value” before the asset can be divided. We now arrive here: How do folks equitably divide these assets? Particularly because the present value doesn’t … Continue reading “Someday” and “Maybe” Numbers: The Challenge of Dividing Retirement Assets Part 3
“Someday” and “Maybe” Numbers: The Challenge of Dividing Retirement Assets – Part 2
{4:00 minutes to read} Just because we determine a value for something does not mean we divide it! Often spouses are concerned that the mere mention of an asset puts it on the auction block and forfeits their exclusive rights to it. Not so! Getting a comprehensive picture and value of ALL assets is an … Continue reading “Someday” and “Maybe” Numbers: The Challenge of Dividing Retirement Assets – Part 2
“Someday” and “Maybe” Numbers: The Challenge of Dividing Retirement Assets – Part 1
{2:48 minutes to read} “Hands off,” decries one spouse, “I worked for this, not you. Back off, you lazy sot!” Retirement Assets While I loathe being the bearer of what could be received as bad news: assets earned during the marriage are marital property and subject to equitable distribution. This includes assets earned directly from … Continue reading “Someday” and “Maybe” Numbers: The Challenge of Dividing Retirement Assets – Part 1
Look Who is Coming to the Mediation Table
{4:54 minutes to read} What happens when attorneys join clients in matrimonial mediation? It’s anyone’s guess! Generally, in my practice, divorce mediations are intimate, including only the parties and the mediator. This often adds to the sense of confidentiality and privacy. It works well for many clients who want to speak candidly about difficult issues … Continue reading Look Who is Coming to the Mediation Table
Anger & Vitriol – and What to Do About Them in Divorce
{6:12 minutes to read) Yes, you’re mad as hell and you’re not gonna take it anymore! That’s what divorce is for. While it’s a normal reaction to refuse, resist and rebel against a divorce that wasn’t wanted, or make a final stand against all the inequities suffered in the marriage gone off track, this—this spot … Continue reading Anger & Vitriol – and What to Do About Them in Divorce
The Mediator Will See You Now…
{4:18 minutes to read} Often, with the best intentions, clients prepare for mediation by trying to resolve as many things as possible before setting foot in my office. They think they’re doing themselves a great service, getting a running head start. However, in my experience, the opposite is true. The time to see the mediator … Continue reading The Mediator Will See You Now…
Sundays, Bloody Sundays
{4:42 minutes to read} Sundays are not known to be the bright spot of the week. Sundays, especially Sunday evenings, can be bleak for everyone, but they can be particularly difficult for the newly divorced. On Sundays, the weekend shuts its eyes, and only Monday gleams on the horizon. For most, this means a return … Continue reading Sundays, Bloody Sundays
Is There Room For Other Professionals in Mediation?
{3:18 minutes to read} People going through divorce often discover they need more help than they initially imagined. Not only are they divorcing, but they now need: Their own health insurance; Life insurance to secure child support/alimony obligations; Therapy to support the period of adjustment; A real estate agent to list the home or find … Continue reading Is There Room For Other Professionals in Mediation?
Why Do People Get Divorced?
{6:12 minutes to read} First, it should be said, no one divorces lightly. No one has ever walked into my office and declared: “We heard there was a special on divorce. We weren’t considering it, but this deal is too incredible to pass up!” No one comes in because they’ve just had a bad day … Continue reading Why Do People Get Divorced?
How Do We Understand Family During Divorce?
{4:18 minutes to read} How do we understand family in a way that’s useful during divorce? First, it’s helpful to deconstruct and decide exactly and specifically what family means to you. When you spend some time “asking into” your initial wants, you can unearth your root values. For example, is it important to you to … Continue reading How Do We Understand Family During Divorce?
Many thanks for guiding my husband and I through a brutal time in our lives with dignity, respect and compassion. You freaking ROCK!
